Today is our 3rd anniversary. I started this tradition with full intention that I would be writing all over the stems of 60+ roses someday.
Each year I’ve written my thoughts about our marriage, our life, our love, our hopes, dreams, anything. Each time I’ve ever given her flowers, she’d save one and kept them in a box to keep forever. In fact, she has a small box of our mementos, first date, later dates, the golf scoresheet when we bet loser had to get a tattoo. She always kept us close to heart.
In grief we turn to loved ones, friends, from all walks of life, to feel a sense of belonging.
From the moment Caitlyn and I met, we could talk for hours. In this tragedy, losing my beloved wife. the only one I want to comfort me is my best friend.
It’s like waiting for the other foot to drop.. always, but it never comes. I feel like I’m waiting to take a breath, come up for air, and have this weight lifted. It never comes.
Cait was always so patient and so happy and always told me she could never ask for more.
Yet, I always wanted to give her more, give her the best, she deserved it. We dreamed of finishing residency, making a life, settling down and finally being done with “The Chase” that is a career in medicine.
I’ll still be giving her her Anniversary Roses. Undoubtedly, I’ll even still find things to write, decades from now. At the end of each year, eve of the new, l’ll wish on stars for a dream that will never come in this life.
We’re working to put together her website, until then Facebook is the easiest way for me to put some thoughts together with pictures. Love you all for the support we’ve had.
December is going to be a hard month for us, but it’s also important to remember the joys we shared. Happy Anniversary my Love, -and to many more in this life or the next.